This week I been lookin' at a well funny geezer. Salivador Dali. He was proper cheese and crackers!
Salivador - or Sal to his chums - was a bit of a loose cannon. He is most famous for melting his mum's mantle clock cos he was bored. He painted pictures of it and sold them for a fair bit of wedge. Personally I don't think it's good to encourage vandalism. I once took a photo of my nephew, Chesney, while he was burning out a neighbours car - but that was to show the filth - I never liked the little brat.
Anyway - Sal was born in Spain - that place where we like to go on our 'olidays - you know - near Benidorm. He grew up to be a right wacky fella with a funny lookin' curly 'tache. He made mental stuff like "lobster mobile phone" and "banana shoes". They never caught on, mind....cos they was stupid. He also done some film and fashion and even designed a building. I think he was a bit confused. Maybe he was skiving behind the bike sheds the day the careers advisor was in?
Whatever he was - and whatever he did - Salivador Dali will live on way beyond his death for one main reason....he's got a well funny name.
I think he should have been put in the nut house along with my cousin Brenda - she always wanted a boyfriend.
Next week - some other rubbish.
Happy chocolate egg day!
Well this week my old friend Franco sent me off to the MMG battle of the band`s competition, being held at my favorite rock n' beer shrine, the Pig n' Falcon! Tonight we have two of St Neots`s finest, breatheren`s of blues rock n roll The Mojo Slide and local alt rock favorites The Simpletone oh and some out of town young uns called From the ashes! With me tonight Puff the magic dragon and me old pal Giant Haystacks had come along for a bit of company. Well it is the start of a bank holiday weekend and Puff and Haystacks love a good tear up! As soon as we strolled in we were greeted by what can only be described as utter chaos. The place is so rammed I was soon spilling me beverage all over me high heels and the giant`s bomber boots, he wasn't happy! Well the air was thick and the tension was rising as The Simpletone kicked off the proceeding`s. I manage to get to the front riding high on Haystacks`s shoulder`s, for a good look at these lovely boy`s. Well what a sight they are, we have lead singer and guitarist Glen Eastoe, A towering figure of hairy delight! This godlike druid wizard of all things fuzz struts and writhes as he roars like a demonic lion! I manage to reach out and gently run my finger`s thru his jet black, sweat drenched mane, and as I do so, I feel his throbbing magic flowing through my moistened finger`s! Simply breathtaking! Then as my leg`s go all jelly like my attentions turn to John Davison, Lead axe man and double winner of St Neot`s grizzly beard or the year award 2011/12.
The man is at ease in front of his adoring fan`s, ripping up stylish Pearl Jam like guitar lick`s and thrusting his tool around like a rampant unkempt bishop in a brothel! Grrrrrrrr!!! Half man half bear! Then we have on bass Alex Aprigliano, the hairy but not so hairy one! his eyes are transfixed he grin`s as his deranged pounding bass grows louder and louder, roughly penetrating my tight eager lobes! "OH' HELP ME MUMSY!" Who is this I spy? An intruder on stage? NAY! It`s the drummer Craig Seymour! And what is this? there is not even a whisper of facial hair to be seen on this chiseled baby faced assassin! Instead this beat demon is smoothed for aerodynamic precision! He whip`s his skin`s like a hardened merciless dominatrix, and I`m loving every filthy stroke!
At this point, in a whirlwind haze of fine herb`s and way too many pint`s of beowulf I collapsed and had to be carried home by my good friend Giant Haystacks! Sadly I missed my beloved Mojo`s, although puff my magical dragon friend tells me they rocked it real good! Although he did tell me sadly, From the ashes`s finest moment was the guitarist`s leather jacket, which his devoted mum had helpfully cut the arms off of and stitched it up nice and neat for him! "Dont worry son yer dad doesn't want it back now!" I also found out from Puff, The Simpletone won the round! Congratulations and celebration`s you lovely hairy rock lords!
Bye bye for now local music lover`s! STAY STRONG!
All Over The Place!
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